"... 'cause everybody is leaving home..."
First post in English, I have no clue why is that, the fact is that today I'm feeling a little more scared, a little more sad and I guess, a little more conffident. The idea of leaving my contry, my house, my family is becoming a reallity, it's not only "an idea" I already have plans to do it, not alone, I think I couldn't do it that way, I'm not that brave, but yes, I have a ticket, it was supposed to be only a ticket to travel to a concert and come back home, back to mom, back to friends but now it's like I'm going to cast away everything to go and live in some other place I don't know, and that scares me the hell out.
Not only that, there might be the possibility to get married, people say it would be easier for us to keep together and to find jobs and stuffs that if we weren't married, but really?? Do I want to get married to him? actually, to anybody. I always said that would never happened, so now, in less than 2 month I have to take like a lot of decisions that I would have never taken in the first place. So I'm scared and shaking.
If I stay in Chile, I probably wont have time to say good bye to all the people I love and care about, that's scary too, but I'm sure if I give it a lot of thoughts I wont do it at all, so I guess I'll do it and that's it, I'll have to man up and face the changes!
Leaving home... why? Is it really necesary? I've been thinking about that lately. Yes, I really want to go and live some other experiences, but am I strong enough? Our relationship is strong enough? Only doing it is the way I'll know. But going back to if it is really necessary, yes, it is. I don't like the things that are happening here, I don't like the hatred in people around me, I feel (and know-it's not only a "sensation") there's not safety, no food, at least not what you really want and like you want it, and I think this is going worse and worse...
It gets me sad to leave my mom, my cat, my friends, all I know is here, good or bad is here, but yes, I think it's time to leave home, like everybody is leaving home...
First post in English, I have no clue why is that, the fact is that today I'm feeling a little more scared, a little more sad and I guess, a little more conffident. The idea of leaving my contry, my house, my family is becoming a reallity, it's not only "an idea" I already have plans to do it, not alone, I think I couldn't do it that way, I'm not that brave, but yes, I have a ticket, it was supposed to be only a ticket to travel to a concert and come back home, back to mom, back to friends but now it's like I'm going to cast away everything to go and live in some other place I don't know, and that scares me the hell out.
Not only that, there might be the possibility to get married, people say it would be easier for us to keep together and to find jobs and stuffs that if we weren't married, but really?? Do I want to get married to him? actually, to anybody. I always said that would never happened, so now, in less than 2 month I have to take like a lot of decisions that I would have never taken in the first place. So I'm scared and shaking.
If I stay in Chile, I probably wont have time to say good bye to all the people I love and care about, that's scary too, but I'm sure if I give it a lot of thoughts I wont do it at all, so I guess I'll do it and that's it, I'll have to man up and face the changes!
Leaving home... why? Is it really necesary? I've been thinking about that lately. Yes, I really want to go and live some other experiences, but am I strong enough? Our relationship is strong enough? Only doing it is the way I'll know. But going back to if it is really necessary, yes, it is. I don't like the things that are happening here, I don't like the hatred in people around me, I feel (and know-it's not only a "sensation") there's not safety, no food, at least not what you really want and like you want it, and I think this is going worse and worse...
It gets me sad to leave my mom, my cat, my friends, all I know is here, good or bad is here, but yes, I think it's time to leave home, like everybody is leaving home...
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